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Falling in "something" in the workplace

Updated: Feb 2, 2023

If you have a workplace, you might be there for most of the waking hours of the week connecting with people within your organisation and clients.


Many of these individuals put a huge effort into curating their at-work persona taking care with how they act, look and even smell.


Organisations are filled with individuals who are different at work than they are at home. It’s easy to confuse the professional persona and think that this is the way that they always are. It’s easy to become attracted to the 'best self' that’s on display; but it may not be real and it may not last for long. All of us can only manage our at-work performance for a limited time before we have to go home and charge our batteries up so we can do it again tomorrow.


If you fall for a colleague or client and then realise you fell for the at-work persona you have a potentially difficult situation reversing your decision. One of you may need to leave the organisation or you may be required to work alongside someone you decided wasn’t for you and forget what happened between you (which is impossible!).


Here are some guidelines for at work relationships


  1. Is the person who has taken your eye available? The statement that says "All's fair in love and war" may seem reasonable on face value, but would the children at home whose lives may be turned upside down agree with this statement?

  2. Who will lose the most out of having a relationship that goes wrong?

  3. Are you willing to give up your job for this person if it comes to that?

  4. Are they willing to give up their job for you?

  5. Are you breaching professional conduct by having an at work relationship?

  6. Will you create a workplace conflict of interest by forming a relationship?

  7. Could the person who has taken your eye accuse you of workplace harassment for your overtures? Remember your organisation has Health and Safety responsibilities for everyone at work and that includes workplace relationships. Kindness in the workplace can be misinterpreted.


Like all relationships, it pays to make sure the head has a say, and not just the heart, especially when there are careers and reputations involved. If you are uncertain about the relationship, the consequences, and your reputation; seek advice from a professional coach and ensure you are making the best choice for your future before you burn bridges in your career.




Marina Shearer

BSc.psychology, Diploma Professional Coaching, Master Trainer

Marina is a coach, professional development expert, and facilitator who specialises in helping people develop themselves so they can be the best version of themselves and conduct their personal and professional lives more effectively.

Learn more about her HERE Don't Miss A Thing My subscribers are the first to know about new courses and special offers. Simply email me so you can be kept in the loop info@profilecoaching.co.nz



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